ben posted something similar to this the other day, but this is on a bigger scale. freaky!

A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good time being spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went.

The wife, after sleeping soundly for one hour, awakened without pain, and as it was still early, she decided to go to the party. In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him.

She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could, and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner high and dry and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived.

She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband. Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang.

Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

She was sitting up reading when he came in and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, “Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you’re not there.”

Then she asked, “Did you dance much?”

He replied, “I’ll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I’ll tell you… the guy I loaned my costume to sure had a real good time!”

A Jamaican wants a job, but the foreman won’t hire him until he passes a little math test.

“Here is your first question”, the foreman said. “Without using numbers, represent the number 9.”

“Without numbers?” the Jamaican says, “Dat is easy.” And proceeds to draw three trees.

“What’s this?” the boss asks

“Ave you got no brain? Tree and tree and tree make nine,” says the Jamaican.

“Fair enough,” says the boss. “Here’s your second question. Use the same rules, but this time the number is 99.”

The Jamaican stares into space for a while, then picks up the picture that he has just drawn and makes a smudge on each tree. “Ere you go.”

The boss scratches his head and says, “How on earth do you get that to represent 99?”

“Each of da trees is dirty now. So, it’s dirty tree, and dirty tree, and dirty tree. Dat is 99.”

The boss is getting worried that he’s going to actually have to hire this Jamaican, so he says, “All right, last question. Same rules again, but represent the number 100.”

The Jamaican stares into space some more, then he picks up the picture again and makes a little mark at the base of each tree and says, “Ere you go. One hundred.”

The boss looks at the attempt. “You must be nuts if you think that represents a hundred!”

The Jamaican leans forward and points to the marks at the base of each tree and says, “A little dog come along and crap by each tree. So now you got dirty tree and a turd, dirty tree and a turd, and dirty tree and a turd, which makes one hundred.”

“So, when I start?”

eric sent this to me yesterday, via digg. some of them are pretty good. here’s a few of my favs:

edit: (oops, they don’t like me linking their images, so yeh, just click on the link to peep the pics)

http://www.oddee.com/item_87332.aspx

found this on digg… kinda funny and gross.

http://www.impactlab.com/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=7649

how much do you wanna bet that it was part of the campaign to call them in as a bomb scare? of course not on paper anywhere or directly tied with the marketing agency, but something like the marketing guy handed me $50 if i make a call from a payphone kinda thing? i’ve never heard of aqua teen force, but the amount of publicity this thing has got is insane. it’s been the main article on cnn.com on and off for 2 days.

cnn.com article

it’s pretty lame how the boston police department let it get this out of hand though. apparently they’ve been around the city for weeks and after a few tips they make a huge scene out of it… the two things i’ve learned from this are that the aqua teen hunger force is cool, and boston cops are dumb.

pretty funny shit. only episodes 1 and 2 have been released so far:

part 1:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1711287

part 2:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1727058

.

was fucking amazing. no details to follow ;)