this past election i voted no on proposition 8, per my little election guide. i didn’t really look into the proposition, other than what i heard both sides arguing in their advertisements, and i figured yeh, why should i vote to deny anyone rights.

i was surprised that it passed here in such a liberal state, but since the election i’ve started to think more about it, what it is they want and what they are being denied. and in listening to gay activists like ellen and in playing devil’s advocate arguing with some of my politically savvy friends, i’ve kinda flip flopped on the issue again.

in all of these protests and on every picket sign, the argument is about “rights.” they argue how in the past we’ve denied women the right the to vote, we’ve denied blacks and other minorities numerous rights, and we’re on the same path again, denying gays the right to marry. but in califorina we have civil unions for same-sex couples, which affords them all of the rights that opposite-sex couples have in marriage.

from wikipedia:

In California where domestic partnership has been available to same-sex couples since 2000, a wholesale revision of the law in 2005 has made it, like the New Jersey civil union law, equivalent to marriage in every respect at the state level, though neither is recognized by the federal government.

so this isn’t as much a rights issue as it is an argument over the word “marriage.” same-sex couples have all the rights as opposite-sex couples do, they can have their civil union blessed by a church, no one’s going to stop them from calling themselves “married” if they want to, they can refer to themselves as each other’s husbands or wives. it’s just on one document somewhere in the county courthouse it’s checked “civil union” instead of “marriage.”

and here’s the thing, marriage really is defined as a union between a man and a woman, so it’s not like they’re being denied a right, it’s that people aren’t willing to change the definition of the word for them. it’s like if i was adopted by a mexican family when i was a newborn, grew up with mexican culture, speaking spanish and it being the only thing i ever identified with, yet when i fill out some government form, i can’t check “latino”.

anyway, i know that this is the unpopular stance (well, i guess it’s the popular stance, but not among my friends) on the subject. but comparing women who were being denied a right to vote, or blacks who were kept as slave’s for God’s sake, to same-sex couples being denied the right to have a word changed to accomodate them seems like a stretch. i don’t regret voting no on 8, if it didn’t pass and they redefined marriage, i really wouldn’t care. i just think that they’re being misleading about this being a rights issue.

two years ago today, me, my wife, and my friends were waking up in japan after a night of drunken karaoke-ing after a day of wedding-ing. it’s hard to believe that it’s already been two years, but they really have been great. i won’t start to gush about my wife ’cause no one likes to hear couples gush, but i really am lucky to have her.

random, but astronaut garret reisman who went up on sts-123 and lived aboard the international space station for 3 months, installing the new japanese science module, kibo among other things, signed this for me yesterday:

and this is a part of taka’s card that i thought was cute enough to post up here:

i accidently only brought my 50mm so my pics are kinda weak. i’m sure that broad with the 10 foot, $1000 lens got some good shots though.

here is my flickr set from the wedding:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/kentomatic/sets/72157604324277879

one of taka’s friends from her home town of fukuoka (the city in japan where we got married last year) went to get her film developed and noticed that apparently there is now a montage of our wedding photos blown up and on display *on* the shop’s wall window. giggity giggity!

her friend only took a small camera phone pic (you’d think those japanese would have more advanced camera phones that could take a better/larger pic?), but said she’d go back with a real camera and take pics of the entire display. i’ll upload them to my flickr when i get them.

i guess we’re just that good looking, and now famous yo!

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i almost feel like i can speak with a bit of authority on the subject now :)

exactly a year ago, me and my lovely wife exchanged vows (that in large part i couldn’t understand) in japan surrounded by friends and family. it’s now a full year later and things couldn’t be better between us. it’s funny, in all my relationships prior, marriage hadn’t really ever been a thought that crossed my mind, but after only a few months of dating, i had a strong feeling that we’d always be together, and when we decided to get married, i couldn’t've been more confident in it. my only concern was that we hadn’t lived together for an extended time, other than the summer we got engaged. luckily and thankfully, taka turned out to be just as wonderful all the time as she was in the short spans that we had spent together. i really love her.

so back to my authority and thoughts on what make marriage work well… my uncle told me that the key was to make just as much personal time for yourselves as you do for each other (this doesn’t include work/school), and after a year i agree that this is paramount. keeping your original individuality and personality is important because that’s what all the interest and love was based on. it’s almost as important as keeping your weight the same as it was when you first fell in love with each other, unless you’re me, and you’re putting on pounds of shredded muscle.

i think the other issue, which may seem obvious, is maturity. not in age, but in character. i had been in other relationships that were fun and crazy, but filled with pithy fights and immature attitudes and idealogy that could be overlooked for the sake of a good time, but not when the goal of the relationship is forever.

i feel so luckly in love to have found such a wonderful person to share my life with.

here’s to another great year, cheers!

… oh, and happy birthday mike!

when i go to visit her later this month, i’m prolly gonna have to take the same pic, since that sign has to be one of the most classic ones in chicago.

she spends most of her time studying, and i guess the tests that she has to take are pass or go home, so there’s not much room to mess around. she’s doing fine though, and i’m sure she won’t have any problems. she said all of her classmates (50 of them) are all super friendly and supportive, and it seems like a college dorm type atmosphere, so regardless it’s a good experience for her.

ben flew out there last weekend to hang out with his friend vanessa and they met up with taka on sunday. oh, poor lonely kent.

she would have let me have this cake at our wedding:

it’s supposedly entirely edible too.

taka and i’ve been pretty consistently hitting the gym 3x a week. we’ve missed a couple in the last few weeks ’cause of colds, and busy schedules but i’m happy she’s sticking with it. she usually does weights with me for a couple of exercises (like on days that i do back/bi’s, she’ll just do back, since that also works bi’s) and then just does cardio, but i’m actually worried that she might develop too much muscle mass. she’s already pulling out sets of 8 @ 90lbs on the lat pull down and i’m definitely starting to see some definition. i love the lean/slightly muscular look on girls, but i just hope i don’t become my neurotic self and take this too far :)

we finally got the wedding photos and the photo album from the photographer. there are gigs and gigs of pics to go through, but i’ll eventually put them all up in some type of gallery. there are some really great pics though.

click here for a printable copy.

in the mean while, check out these scans of the wedding album.

www.ishigooka.com/wedding_2006

yep, so after only 2 days with her resident alien card, we’re a dual income family and she’s now an “export assistant” for an export company in torrance and is going to start working the normal 9-5 (or 8-5, where does anyone only work from 9-5 these days?) it happened a lot quicker than i imagined, but she got into a network of japanese recruitment agencies that were constantly calling and setting up interviews.

we’re going to be carpooling for now since her office is only about 5 miles from mine, but it looks like we’re probably going to move up north a bit so we don’t both have to deal with that ridiculous drive every morning.